Feb. 25th, I dropped our son off at the Mother’s Morning Out program at a local church. It was harder for me than I expected. It is not the first time that we have left John. But is the first time I have packed a lunch for him and a change of clothes (just in case) and left him. It feels too much like he is going to school for the first time. And after an hour had past, I already missed him. Monday through Thursday, we have someone come to our home to watch John so at least I hear him during the day.
My favorite times with John are early in the mornings when he first wakes up. We have a routine of snuggle –time on the couch as he sucks his fingers and wipes the sleep from his eyes. I usually use this time to sing to him…songs like “Jesus Loves John”; “Jesus Loves the Little Children” and then I venture either into old hymns that I remember from childhood or pop songs with word changes so they are personal to John. Karen Carpenter’s “Close to You” is a fun one to personalize.
I find it interesting that for over 30 years I have been in at least a weekly setting where I sing contemporary praise songs yet what comes back to me in the middle of the night or in the mornings to sing to John are the old hymns. I grew up in a Methodist church that liked to sing. I used to love the Sunday night service hymn sings where the congregation got to choose what we sang. Even as a young person I would boldly call out my favorite hymn hoping that the person leading the singing would hear me.
Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” I am so grateful to have been “trained-up” with a hefty dose of traditional hymns that are now stored in my reserve.
A funny thing about singing during snuggle-time…although John does not talk, he wants his “voice” to be heard and followed (but who doesn’t, right?). Usually during the first bit of silence as I finish one of the morning songs, John will “eah” for another one. As long as I keep singing, he lays contently next to me, sucking his fingers. What cracked me up the other morning is that when I started to sing, he put his little hand gently over my mouth. Just to be sure I understood his non- verbal’s, I started up another song and sure enough his little hand repeated the gesture. At that point I had to question whether I actually sing for him or for me in the mornings. Singing the hymns reminds me that John is in God’s hands; it gives me a foundation of strength when we hit rough patches during the day.
Another growing up activity that John did today was that he got his first US hair cut. He did very well sitting on my lap with Ron taking the photos.
